|
You
Might Be A Nurse If....
You
avoid unhealthy looking peoples in the mall for fear that
they'll drop near you and you'll have to do CPR on your day off.
It doesn't bother you to eat a candy bar with one hand while
performing digital stimulation on your patient with the other
hand.
You've had a patient with a nose ring, a brow ring and twelve
earrings say, "I'm afraid of shots."
You've ever bet on someone's blood alcohol level.
You plan your next meal while performing gastric lavage.
You believe every waiting room should have a Valium salt lick.
You have your weekends off planned a year in advance.
You have ever had a patient control his seizures when offered
food.
You know it's a full moon without having to look at the sky.
Author: Michael Seaver, RN, EMT-P (Goofy ER RN)
Michael@EMSCON.net
Types
Of Doctors
There
are several types of doctors, and it's said they can be
differentiated by the following method:
General practitioners know nothing and do little.
Surgeons know little and do everything.
Internists knows everything and do nothing.
Pathologists know everything and can do everything, but it's
usually too late.
..and then we have Shrinks who cure dreams...or dream cures.
Author Unknown
A
Short History of Medicine
I
have an earache...
2000 B.C. - Here, eat this root.
1000 A.D. - That root is heathen. Here, say this prayer.
1850 A.D. - That prayer is superstition. Here, drink this
potion.
1940 A.D. - That potion is snake oil. Here, swallow this pill.
1985 A.D. - That pill is ineffective. Here, take this
antibiotic.
2000 A.D. - That antibiotic is artificial. Here, eat this root.
With Jacksonville University's online RN to BSN program, you can earn the same BSN degree as on-campus students anytime, anywhere, 24/7! Click here for more info and a free catalog!
FEATURED SCHOOLS
|
NURSING HUMOR
