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The
Tapeworm
A
patient walks into a doctors office complaining of abdominal
discomfort. The doc takes a fecal sample and discovers his
patient
has a tapeworm. He tells his patient "Don't worry, I have
the perfect
treatment. Come in tomorrow with a hard boiled egg and a
chocolate
chip cookie." The patient is a little confused, but does as
the doctor
orders.
The
next morning, the doctor asks his patient to drop his pants and
bend over. Next, he shells the egg and inserts it in the
patients rectum.
The doc closely monitors his watch and exactly two minutes later
inserts
the cookie as well. He tells the patient to come in tomorrow
with another
egg and another cookie.
The
next morning, the doctor does the same thing: inserts the egg
and
exactly two minutes later inserts the cookie. This goes on for
three more
days in exactly the same manner and by this time the patient is
really
confused.
Finally,
on the fifth day of treatment, the doc says "OK, tomorrow I
want
you to come in with another hard boiled egg, but this time bring
a hammer
instead of a cookie, ok?"
The
next day, the patient comes in and the doc inserts the hard
boiled
egg as usual. He closely monitors his watch as two minutes
pass...then
three minutes...then four minutes...Suddenly the tapeworm sticks
his head
outside and shouts "Where the Hell is my Cookie!!" and
the doc hits it over
the head with the hammer, curing his patient.
Author Unknown
You've
Got Mail
A
man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive
blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went
straight to the mail box. She opened it then slammed it shut
stormed back in the house.
A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail
box and again opened it, slammed it shut again.
Angrily, back into the house she went.
As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, she came out
again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed
it closed harder than ever.
Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something
wrong?"
To which she replied, "There certainly is!"
My stupid computer keeps saying, "YOU'VE GOT MAIL."
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